2014 was a exciting year for me and I was thinking it will be hard to top it but I guess I was wrong. Every year will have something that lurks around the corner and give you a surprised and 2015 is much a roller-coster ride.
2015... the year where I met my personal goal to actually work abroad, leaving my country. Although i got the job offer of working in Mexico, i have to let it go just because I was not able to come to an agreement with my parents but all was not lost as I was able to land a job in the neighbouring Singapore, which is not to shabby i guess.
Leaving for Singapore has been an adventure. I was forced to leave my comfort zone and go out to relearn everything. It has also taught me an invaluable lesson of appreciation, oh... how i missed the guilty pleasure of driving to the footsteps to malls or to the office; how I missed those late night hang outs with friends, chit chatting away too the wee hours of the night; how I missed having a kitchen of my own to do some cooking whenever I feel like it. So much more I missed, so much I've now looked back and thought to myself, damn those are freedom.
It has also taught me some life lessons mainly of those I once mentioned on Facebook
1. Nobody will understand the amount of sacrifice you've made when you decided to move.
2. Regardless of how much you make, they will automatically assumed you are now rich.
3. It is never easy starting out new again.
4. You will miss the little guilty pleasures you did back home such as hanging out till wee hours in the morning, or the call from your friend that they are now outside your house waiting for you.
5. You actually begin to understand the cliche "There's no place like home" .
6. The colour of the grass are only as green as you perceive it to be
7. Things that doesn't seems that important back then are among the most important thing to you today.
8. How a phone call or message change the "distance" between people.
9. People will say how enviously they are of you but they will not make the same decision as you because.... "reasons" .
10. How old your parents has become since you decided to leave home.It has also taught me the pain of loneliness and solitude. This 8 months in Singapore has been among the loneliest time I've ever had to myself. There are just nobody for me to do anything with. Yes, I do still have some friends here but I can't always go and bug them can't I? My colleagues were once my closest family away from my real family, but over here.... I hardly have a chance to mingle with my colleagues. The solitude is real, the pain is real.... the loneliness are beyond words. I've spend hours roaming Singapore, looking for places to visit and to eat but even that has it limits when you are always alone. Up to the point that I've now countless hours hiding in my room, alone, talking to myself from time to time. I drive myself up to wall sometimes. Is it that difficult to get a friend here? Or it is just me? Just me bring pathetic and shy myself away from everyone? I don't know.
With 2016 around the corner I do hope it will be a better year for me. I'm damn afraid of solitude now ... I really am.... so please help me...
