Why did i left my last job?
That was among my question i asked in one of those "How well u know ... " quiz and to those who attempt it would have know the answer to that by now. So that leads me here ... I came to Penang to join "I" for a gamble... i always ask myself this "Would you give up something you know you want for something you think you want?" How much would you gamble for an uncertaintenty?
I took the gamble... I've given up my place at KayEll, my friends and my family there to come here for a gamble. A gamble saying that this is what i want, this is what i enjoy doing... but another question arise from my actions from yester-years, today.... is this what i wanted? I wanted a piece of the pie and now, i might actually get a slice of it... or should i say 14 pieces of it.
Am i biting off something that i can't even chew? Usually i would have no doubt in myself in work but this time it really borthers me but today there are two things that clouds my judgement of myself. First and foremost is the fact that i'm on "I" where the smartest of the smart works and deliver (or that is what they say), am i even qualify to hold a candle to them? YS, YY, CL, KS, MH... and the list goes on, they are the among the godlike people that i know at work. Where will i stand when i'm put in line with them or will i just be another piece of "something" after a stampede?; and secondly, am i really ready to take up all 14 of these baskets ?
Something CS said today over Facebook which does give me a keyhole to what my future might hold. Hours and hours of endless overtime with endless issues and debug and all alone in a big and empty freezer of solitude; that is what i've gotten myself into and this is the outcome of my little gamble. Give me victory or give me death... i guess this is the only thing i can tell myself now. Unless i try i will never know ~~
Trans-Am fullburst mode - ikimas~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~
1 comment:
For me, it's not about being the best of the bests. No one is perfect. I learned something today. Someone said, the grass is always greener on the other side of the fence. I think you just need to believe in the things you do because be it right or wrong, we'll always learn something out of the experience we gained, something valuable to yourself :).
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