2 face of a same picture

Its been few days now, with me being under the weather... emotionally i mean. But the fact is, i think its been like this for almost 2 weeks now but it just went downhil just recently.

Sigh~~ There is no doubt in myself that i'm not really in a mood for anything lately and to make things worse is that i am behaving like nothing happened, i'm still the same ol' me to everyone. Just that how succesful i've been on this is a little controversial.

I'm hiding myself behind another me who is incapable of feelings and emotions just that i don't look "different" in front of everyone... well on the other hand, i might look like a zombie that way.

How long will this prolong? How much longer do i need to be like this?

I feel like screaming my lungs out

I feel like i wanna cry inside

I feel like there is a torn somewhere in my body and i can't take it out

I just dun feel like me...

Why is that all the suddenly being lonely sounds so scary to me now? All this while i've care less abuot it but recently even the thought of having dinner alone seems so scary to me now.

Tomorrow is another day .... now where have i put that damn mask of mine... ... ... ...