All the sudden I have a surge of thought. This is my 4th year working and going into my 3rd year in "I". Looking back at what I have achieved seems to be ... ... ... nothing. Back in my early days of working back in "S", I don't have ownership towards anything and my role there is just to provide support. Support for board debug, support for rework, support for under-staff. It was just support, support and support, the only project give to me was even later killed which give me a big "WTF!!!" through my head. And with those points in mind, I left. Left for another company elsewhere hoping that things can and will be different.
But did it ??
So I started my journey in Penang, working in "I" where most people often mistaken as a "rich people population" company i.e. high pay and execelent benefits. But how true is that statement? I can't deny that my pay and the benefit here is certainly better than my ex-company but is it a par with all those around me ? That is a question mark. Anyway going into my 3rd year of service, my pay is not that much higher than a fresh graduate and i'm not getting the proper recognization from my manager which lead me to think, what the hell am I still doing here? Overworked and under appreciated. Luckily for me, there is a change in management and it seems (and i do mean it SEEMS) that my new manager seems to be sheading some light on me.... well I'll see how it goes on from here, hopefully it's worth the wait and effort.
Shifting gear into something less official yet equally stressful... ... ...
4 years in the industry, 5 years in tertiary education and another 5 years in secondary education; 15-16 years of my life meeting people, knowing people, interacting with people all almost on a daily basis and yet... ... ... one word, lonely . Pathetic? May be ... I've put too much of my effort in work, studies and activities that I've neglected love, emotions and feelings; all of which I have little or none. I'm 27 this year and I'm seeing a lot of my friends tying their knots with their significant others while some are in progress to upgrade their status to Daddy.
All this lead me think that something is wrong with my lifestyle and I needed to change. I need more time outside of office, outside of work so I took up another hobby, photography. But the problem is ... ... now I spend less time in the office/lab but I spend the equivalent time at home editing the photos that I took which brings me back to square one. I still can't met new friends. Work and photography... the things that I love and have passion for and it is also the thing that is and may absolutely kills me....
May be I'm better off alone and lonely... which reminds me of another song that perfectly fits the current me.林凡：一个人生活
I guess I better stick to these words ... 不再当宅男，立志当个快乐的摄影人!!! as much flaw there is in this sentence but currently it is the only thing that I can relate and feel happy about. When there is no hope around, the faintest light can seems so bright.
It's not easy being a leech but i've manage to survive in this harsh environment.. so here's my day... as a leech
Lich's Corrupted Library
- Burps N Yummies (4)
- Feelings and Emo (19)
- Interesting (5)
- Leech's Inside (51)
- Met ups and Reunions (18)
- Not my day (24)
- Pages of the Pathetic Poet (16)
- Random Thoughts (31)
- Trips and Holidays (7)
The Lich's network
l
|
has experienced a day in a leech's world
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