"Can u finish it by today?"

This is something that i could never anticipate coming from someone like him... I'm currently helping him to complete something that SHOULD been HIS work, but in the end... W and i nid to assist him to finish it. He overbudget, then y should i absorb his mistake?? If its something we should nid and its the right part then if its out of budget then go ahead, use mine... but how come i should absorb his mistake?? i kenot understand, i kenot accept, i just kenot .... Now helping him he is making such comment as if its our duty to do it.. SHIT man...

Do u honestly think i care a damn about u now?? All of use are gated coz of ur slow response n low efficency in executing task. Y cant u stand up n face the music??

Y dun u wan take responsibility for ur own things if not ur own actions??

WHY!!!!!!????

I can't help to think wat did i do wrong?? Because of this damn project, i've been screwed by Windz, quarrel wif Boa and raised my voice at Bliz... all for nothing. How come i end up in this mess?? I was a star when it comes to written assignment n other work but this time... i'm nothing but a beat up dog. I got about 8 days to complete my thesis but i'm still drafting it and the thing is, i cant think of anything to write the thesis today coz my mood now is damn unstable. Windz i'm sorry dat i've doubted u in the first place...

I've said this once n i'll say it again... ... God, give me strength, will power n determination to finish this project. Now i have to work 200% to finish the damn thing...

I can't take it anymore~~!!!

Hv u ever wonder just how far u can force urself to go before breaking down ? Have u ever give a thought of how fragile faith could be? Have u ever wonder how well u know some1 b4 seeing they r just not the person who u give them credit for?? Have u ever wonder how a drowning victim would feel just b4 they reach their end?

Before the day is thru all i wanted to write about is wat a bad day it had been today but in the end, i changed my mind... Got to know something dat had been less than encouraging from a fren (althought is nothing but it really brought down some mood)... Then was the power outage in the lab which wipe out my codes, all i left with is my Hex codes... Then the 68HC11 is finally up, now i nid to choose between the HC11 n the PIC which is a little hard to choose since i've done so much on both chips. Not forgetting the constant help request that i'm getting, god damn it, if i got time to spend to assist some1, i might has well use it for my own project, rite? Well all these stuff above can really bring u down but it was wat happen later when i was in windz place dat really got me thinking, "Wat sh*t have i got myself into??" Although i've got this problem popping in n out of my head a lot since the past month but today really gotten me to crack. Bliz was saying dat i got myself some bad company which i really can't help agreeing...

Well as of today i got about 18 days before the big day... i nid to submit my thesis. But as of today, my project is still less dat 50% complete. Yup, no kidding is LESS THAN 50% hahaha... wat can i say?? wat can i do?? wat hv i done wrong? If the task assigned is so simple then how come nothing is completed till today? Y do you nid keep dragging?? Y can't u make decision??? Y can't u come up wif solution to YOUR own problem??!!! Everyone is looking at me for answers but there is just no answers from me.. i'm only responsible for the brain of the project, like wat dabao said.. If we were to built a Power Ranger Zord, i'm just the control room, the bird.. wat else can i do??? I'm doing all i could for my part so that the project will go on well.. But you... do u nid me to take control n finish the this for u??

The once invinsible Leech is now being brought down by bad company hahaha... MUAHAHA~~~ the bigger u are, the harder u fall. I should have taken Shee's advice n bail when i still could, at least then i might be able to do something on my own n i might actually have finish my damn thing... hahhahaahahahaha~~~ i work better when i'm on my own at least i'm able to control all the factors but now...

To whomever that might read this post, if its not too much of a problem please leave some words of encouragement coz right now i'm really in need of some... Low confidence n moral.

Jz call me Mr. Assembly

Well, so far most of my peers has start to know me as mr assembly.. not oni has i produce my motorola code, i've produce my PIC codes too. I've done both the assembly and using the PBasic Pro version.. now jess ask me to teach her the Atmel codes too... according to the notes she have, it is said dat the Atmel codes are similiar wif the Intel codes, if i were to teach her about the Atmel assembly codes then i might start speaking to people in assembly instead of English hahah..... i'm going crazy!!!

The end is near...

Well.. after been missing from blogspot for so long, i would expect the 1st thing i might actually blog about would be somethng nice n sweet but on the contrary it isn't. Let me see.. today is the 28th of November, i still have 24 days to complete my final year thesis and with 24 days left one would assume that the things would be about 90% completed right?? mUAHAHAHHA.. if it was i would be blogging about something else.. i've really allied myself wif the wrong group this time, i just coudn't believe that after more that 6 months since the project begin, till now i still have nothing... WHY!!!! wat have i done to deserved this???

My personal progress has reached 65% since all i nid to do now is to test my program n do some debugging, that is dispite all the mishap i had of NOT having the adapter to program my chip. I've took the initiative to learn a new chip and i've even finish dat set of program. U see i started using the MC68HC11 which was a microprocessor dat we've learned in uni and when i actaully use it, there was no programmer dat i could use to program the chip so the uni nid to buy the adapter to use wif the universal programmer, so i waited n waited n waited n waited which brought me to come up wif a backup plan.. use a PIC chip so i spend some time to learn up the assembly codes (actually just 2 days) n produce a whole new set.

When the adapter came, no1 in the uni know how to use it so we asked the supplier to come to teach us and it ended wif more dissappointment.. we still can't program the damn chip.. so i made up my mind to switch to PIC. Tien Kai keep on asking me to learn the PBasic Pro so i did.. and after 3 days, i produce ANOTHER set of codes which brought me to 3 sets of coding...

A miracle happened.. choong en happen to found out wat was wrong wif the programmer and now we can program our chip hahah ^^ yippie... but my happiness was short lived... after 2 WHOLE months my group has yet to produce the hardware for me to test my program. I've finished n finalize my 6811 codes since a month ago and yet the guys have not gimme a hardware... now we r down to 24 days....

Well i can't blame everyone, just that one of the member has yet to show me anything concrete that i can use which is really... REALLY ... REALLY got me worried... the power supply n the whole motor drive system is not up yet... and we oni got 24 days.. brother... i still nid to debug the system after integration but now all i got is just plain air to integrate my program wif...

HAHAHAHA... MUAHAHAHAHAH.... god... please have mercy on my soul... i can slowly but surely see my FYP "A" flying away from me... could this be the end for my 2nd upper??? .... i dun dare to think... all i can do now is to produce wat i could n hopefully i can make it in time... Lee.. hang on in there... when the going get tough, u get tougher.. u can n u MUST do it...

Something that can't drop

Well... tis is something i had in mind since our last gathering during fatt's farewell and if i dun write it out it'll stick in my mind forever... the story is like tis, in our last gathering i was talking to HY in the car on our way to pick up 018; we were both talking about me and there are 2 things that she mentioned that is really worth remembering. 1st is that about my little "issue". Now i know y the gang won't let me off and keep bugging me about that little issue of mine. When i told her that i've forgetten about it, she totally did not believe me because according to her, its quite impossible to be able to forget about it so easily. I guess i'm better that i thought, i am able to forget it so easily. Which brought to the 2nd issue...

The 2nd thing is that i'm a dangerous person because i keep my feelings too well, its like a walking timebomb. I keep my feelings so thight that i might hurt myself. The example she give was that when i feel sick, i'll ignore it that until its TOO serious then only i know i'm sick. Well i can't say that she's wrong coz that's me ... I never know wat i'm feeling coz i've ignore my feelings for a quite sometime, like i previously mention, i took 10yrs of my life to learn how not to feel, how many person u know dat is able to do it? To ignore feelings, emotions and emphaty towards people. I cant say dat i regret my decision back then because i'm who i am today because of that skill. Thru that skill i've learn a lot about managing people and how to make reasonable decisions. Now, although i've stop practicing that skill of mine but i still find it difficult to know wat i'm feeling, especially those warm feelings... for example, how do i know when i really fell for some1? wat is luv?? wat does it feels like? I chose love for my example because its the best example i could think of.

Mixed feeling, emotion and watever ... all jumbled up

Well today is not a gud day for me ... reason? Well, i got some gud news, some not so gud news and a terrible news... talk about the good, the bad and the ugly... sigh...

Well the good news is dat a close fren of mine is returning from UK today, i just dunno wat flight will he be in .. its been awhile since i last saw him so kinda looking forward for a meeting

The not so good news is the fact dat 018 is leaving for PG today... yup, he's starting his job on monday so he's going up today. Most of my frens are everywhere... its getting harder to keep wif them now.. i dun even know most of them went .. aint life a ball?

The horrible news is the news dat yf's dad was admitted to the hospital after being stabbed by a robber ... god damn it.. if u wan the money then just show the knive and take the money, y the hell do u wanna stab the fella... the thief nowadays has got from bad to worse .. welcome to the country's education system i guess... can't they be more professional? Screw u thieves!!! may u rot in hell and choke whenever u try to eat and drink. %*)^^$!$_!^$!)

Next on the agenda is the dinner i had wif Yap. Well our little meeting at Ms Ooi's wedding i got to know dat everyone back in GMS and ACE has left... Yap was the last.. Not forgetting dat Ms Ooi is pregnant.. haha.. it just looks funny .. i totally felt like a kid there, i might be the youngest there but .. well.. like i say its a mix feeling ...

There is a reason y i wanna keep tis short ... i'm sleepy and tired hahaha... i just wanna keep a record of my life especially on this "remarkable" day

My first .... .... ... ...

Firstly tis is wat happen on Merdeka day... i got to uni at around 11am and i started on Dr N's paper... it was tough.. mind boggling, muscle straining, and eye tiring task to read his paper... so much theory... so much knowledge... just so much.. start to get a feel of wat the card from MTG- Rush of Knowledge feels like.. no wonder it can deal damage to player hahaha... Well i was at Dr N's stuff till 1am... for the record tis is the 2nd time i actually had a full rush of knowledge.. for the 14 hours i've studied.. i had a minimum of 8 solid hours of pure studying ... and it really can take a toll on the body. Later WY, Meng, KT, Dailo and i got together and went for a drink at a mamak stall. At around 2 we all went our way... on my way back, the thing on my head was to get home ASAP so i ran a redlight and guess wat.. there were some traffic police there waiting for me .... muhahahaa.... after 6years of driving... i got my FIRST .. i repeat.. my FIRST summon, it happen at the traffic light in front of Genting Court at 2.22AM hahaha... damn... the cops hint me for the "tolong" thingy but i only had about 30ringgit in my wallet so i din think it would work, but only to found out later dat there was a "student price" wtf... well now is a bit too late since i've got the damn ticket now .. sigh.. now i need to settle the damn thing b4 the 15th..

Short trip to Nilai part 2

Well tis is a follow up to my previous post about my short trip to Nilai (http://aleech.blogspot.com/2006/05/short-trip-to-nilai.html)

These r some of the photos we took... can't believe its been almost 4 months since i last saw AJ... Not forgetting YF whom i won't be meeting earliest next year .. hope she's fine over there...

well tis is everyone... smilling away in front of the camera

Hey i din know the camera has a remote control hahaha

Supper time... ordered some burgers coz every1 was hungry...

Well luv to share more photos but can't find any more suitable photos to be published publically hahaha... Oh ya.. did i mention dat i can actually see the Nottingham University from tis burger stall hahaha... coz ah Fatt is studying there .. he has grad from his Masters programme now and AJ is going to finish his degree in UK.. wat bout me?? still struggling and sulking .. sigh.. well lets not go there and let my enjoy tis hapi moment a bit longer

Its a cold cold day.. + some random thoughts

Well usually when i say cold i mean it literally but today.. i truely mean it. It's been raining since the afternoon and the weather now is just simply marvelous for sleeping yet i can't.. talk about torture... finals is next week and i've yet to master any of the topics from any subject.. and i truely wonder whether will i be able to finish everything in time for exam. I remember i told some1 dat "U'll have enuf time finish, so dun pressure urself" even though i noe dat i'm facing the same problem too... haha dat's me, always finding ways to make other ppl feel better while myself is walking the plank aboard the pirate ship. The end is near yet i tell ppl around me its not.

Been having a lot of thoughts lately... I'm in my final year now... in about 6 months time i'll finish my course here and graduate.
Wat will happen to me??
.
.
Where will i work?
.
.
Should i try my luck again back at Intel?
.
.
Should i give a thought to wat TTL has offered me?

and for the more personal question... Will i be able to get that special someone b4 i graduate from this wicked place i call skool??

Recently wif all these so called "peer-pressure" dat i'm getting from everyone, i just cant help thinking will i gradute from uni STILL being single? Sometimes seeing some of my frens during their convo, having dat special some1 by his/her side during dat moment, well u'll notice dat they'll smile even happier dat others. Yea.. i have frens but i just wanna know wat does it feels like having dat special some1. If WY were to read tis the 1st thing dat comes to his crocked mind is "U have target o not?? Dun juz think.. must act la" [ hehe.. well WY if u r reading tis pls proof me wrong] Targets?? Muahaha... Yes.. No.. i dunno hahaha...

#wif sleepy eyes# spend entire day in library again today... due to the weather.. i reall feel tired no. just feel like drop everything n go to sleep... but i can't.. coz a lot of stuff i've not finish sigh.... i'll see how long am i able to push myself b4 surrendering to this wonderful sleeping weather hahha... the time now is 930PM hahhaha

Me easy to mix??

I've been getting a lot of this, "U knows everyone" or the "Can u name me some1 u dunno" and the "Lam kau yau" ( its chinese, for some1 who mix wif virtually every1, its usually to meant it a bad way) . Sometimes i wonder izzit a compliment or whether its an insult.. gheeze....

While havin dinner wif windz n irene we discussed about mixing aroud. Irene make a remark dat i belong to those hyperactive, talkative and easygoing type.. well basically i'm ok wif the remark is dat when windz say dat i "lam kau" dat got me a little uneasy... Irene says dat i could be a good housemate haha.. i wonder.. I told her about my little hidden temper and of my lifestyle well i'm not that easy going sometimes... it still depends on the Who, What, When, Why, and How factors.

So back to my question.. "easy to mix around" ... a compliment or an insult????

Wat do u all wan???

Well it's been less dat an interesting day today. Woke up in the morning just to know dat i wasn't able to connected to the internet.. i was thinking could it be the DNS thingy since it keep on saying unable to resolve DNS. I tried numerious DNS but still nothing.. after a few more tried i give up and went to uni to study.

In uni it was a bit boring since i was alone. At around 4++ WY showed up but i went on wif my studies without giving too much attention to him as there is nothign much i can help him now (i can hardly help myself) At around 6, after many hours of constant head stuffing and squeezing, i stop to rest. WY and i got engage in some rubbish talking it was quite a good way to relax until he started wif his "I know how u feel" and the "I know it doesn't feel good" etc ... sigh..

Well the thing is tis, those who know my little story, knows dat the story has taken a little twist and now the story has ended wif a totally different and twisted end. To the gang, everyone thinks dat i'm affected by it, when i mean everyone i do mean everyone, except for ccl and meng. I mean wat is there to be affected by? To me to engage in an emotion is difficult but to forget 1... hahah as easy as ABC 123. I din take 10 yrs to pratice for nothing. The thing is dat everyone keep on thinking dat i'm unhappy, sad and affected by it and they keep on thinking dat i'm faking it when i tell them dat i'm fine etc. No matter how many times i've explained dat i'm ok wif it so on and so forth but none of them wanna listen... wtf. I'm starting to think dat is them who is having a problem and not me. I'm still as cool as a cucumber on this matter and i dun feel upset at all but them... .. .. #sigh#

Y cant i be ok wif it?? Y must i be unhappy by it? Y ?? I'm an achiver, if i'm unable to drop things such as this then where would i stand? How would i go to achive my goals?? DO they wan me to cry or swear or be emotionally drain n down b4 they r satisfied? Gheeze... cant they just accept the fact dat i'm ok? Is it so hard to believe dat i'm totally ok and normal? If there is really something dat i wish to say, it would be "May u be happy and well" and i would like to tell them to lay off. Don't try to influence me to go into a bad mood... it just seems wrong .. Anyway dat is basically dat wat i told WY when he started wif tis nonsense again and i told him to just drop it. Hopefully he will.

At around 8 i went home just to find out dat the line is still down.. this got my bored-o-meter to shoot up to almost infinite. I linger around the house like a fish out of water, doing tis n dat just to pass time. At almost mid nite, dad got a phone call dat guy was talking about phone problem tis n dat which made dad really restless. So on the 3rd attemp i got the phone, and i too got restless, I manage to hear him out and then i appoligize for my behaviour which made him quite happy too. Just b4 i hung up the guy on the other end asked whether are we stealing his phone line which got me a bit angry, i just told him dat "Y should i, i even have my own streamyx here" he just said ok and hung up. After spend sometime thinking, i made a little experiment and found out dat the guy wasn't lying.. something IS wrong wif my phone line. The number dat is connected to my phone is not my phone number at all. I make it a point to go to Telekom in the morning to get tis settle wif...

Look at the time.. its time to log off and sleep like a log hehehe ... till next time

Tick-tock... tick-tock

Do u hear the passing of time? Wif each passing second, i'm getting closer n closer to the finals haha.. life sux. I always wonder, how come i've been facing exam since a young boy and its been more than 10 years, but how come whenever is exam time u'll get the shivers? Anyone who is anyone is worried... We discussing it wif Fatt Seng and a few others ytd, wif my current CGPA i wonder will i b able to pull it up to 2nd upper.. its so close yet its SOOOOO far... can i, will i, should i even think of getting a 2nd upper?? it's so mythical now... sigh...

Ever since i've step down from the position of chairman i start to get the initial study mood i once had back in year 2, i think its a gud sign.

Almost everyone is bugging me about my private life recently and i wonder y do they even borther wif it. I'm an average guy who has not given much thoughts of getting a mate and yet ppl around me r pushing me to get 1 saying dat its my final year in uni blah blah blah... well like i always say, u choose ppl and ppl choose u. DO u honestly think dat the person u think u wan, wants u? Or do u think the person u really thing u wan is the one u REALLY wan? Its not easy getting in a relationship and as much as i wan one. I've honestly tried to get involved but in the end ... ... ... just say i dun think i tried as hard as i think i could. Like the song from TLC, Waterfall

Dun go chasing waterfalls
Please stick to the river and the lakes dat u used to
I know dat ur gonna have it ur way o nothing at all
But i think u r moving too fast .. ~~

The moral of this song is dat u keep to the things dat u r used to and take things step by step. I was nvr good in handling relationship or feeling; the only thing i'm good at is legal-politics, adminstrative and management. Well i might not be really "good" but i feel more at place when i'm doing things like dat. The problem is ... will i ever get a "someone" to be by my side?? only time will tell... ... ...

Did the DiSC personality dat Patrick Han gived us. According to him, most ppl have their D and i about the same but how come for me my i and S is about the same while my D is WAY WAY WAYYYY low... just 1. Let me put it in a more readable format here, tis is wat i got for my tally box
........Most Least Difference
D .......1......... 9.......... -8
i .........8......... 5........... 3
S.........6......... 4........... 2
C ........3......... 2........... 1
N ........6........ 4
Total 24 ......24

So i'm the "i" type the Influencing type, i'm a peaceful, self-promiting, non-demonstrative and high standard kinda person.
my self perception? my pattern: appraiser
Wat people expects of me?? my pattern: the Counselor;
Wat instinctive response to pressure? my pattern : perfectionist

Haha.. well tis is my DiSC results.. to those reading this, care to share ur 2cents?

A nice chat

Well i know it's been like forever since i last updated my blog but i can explain hahaha.... damn tis makes me feel guilty ... previously there was a period where blogspot seems like dun let me blog, everytime i click on create new post the site just hangs there.. it went on for bout 2weeks ++ until i got fed up and then stopped... Well better late dat never rite? hehehe... well back to my blog ... ... ...

Today was a funny and gud day if i may add. Started the day wif my MP tutorial class, i was wonderin wat got into Charlie, she's like a bit "high" today.. i even asked her has she took her meds b4 class.. she was SO worked up wif the name Kah Chun and insisted dat Ah Wah was How Kah Chun until i told him to show her his IC which she really came n see.. swt... then she insisted Andrew as Lim Kah Chun too... hahaha... she's a bit out of orbit today i think.. may be is the fact dat it is out last class wif her and she's FINALY thru wif us hahaha. There was 1 joke when she told us dat Patrick (our lecturer) told their HOD dat the "EE students r hardworking" we were like "WTF ... was he drunk?" lolz... nvr in a million years i would hear dat coming from our lecturer hahaha... The only think dat i feel sorry was dat i wasn't able to take a photo wif Ms Chia today.. it's kinda sad u know, not having some memories of my teachers dat have tought me, so i've decided to get a camera ASAP so i can take photos of them later .

Well later today after all my class i was in the library studying when yanseng "reminded" me about my absence of blog material and not to mention the same reminder from WY dat i know there r actually ppl reading this piece of blabbing rubbish dat comes out of my mind hahaha... it feel good to have ppl admiring ur work muahahaha...

At about 3++ i went to the canteen to refill my water bottle and leong hooi's when i met Ms $$. It came to a surprise dat i dun recognize her, she said hi and then asked whether i recognize her o not which obviously i didn't hehehe (feeling kinda bad for not remembering ppl faces) coz tis is i think the 2nd time it had happen but each time for some reason, the 1st time was dat she has trim her hair which makes her look a little different and tis time she was wearing a pair of spectacles. U know.. when girls wear spectacles they r a totally different person, they look SOO different. Anyway we got engage in a conversation. It went from a normal "hi, how do u do" to a vry social and enjoyable chat and i believe tis is the 1st time i've talked to her since we knew each other. Standing in front of her n talking to her i found out dat she's from Sg Petani, Kedah; tis is her first time in Kl; she got involved in accident right before skool started; there r only 7 ppl in her course and she's the only female (tis explains the escorts); and she can cook hahaha, a skill dat is deteriorating among girls in tis century [no offence ladies]. The best part is about wat she told me about me hehehe.. she said dat she have a vry gud first impression of me and she thinks gud of me. I can't believe dat i'm still able to inspire ppl nowadays. Hearing dat i start to flirt around wif her saying funny if not crazy stuff (as usual) . All these chit-chat was broken when i got a call from LH asking me to buy something for him to eat and then we talk for aout 5 more mins b4 going in separate ways.

After refilling i got back to the lib to continue studying since i can't go anywhere.. it was rainin outside and i can hear *dogs barking and cats meowing outside so loud dat i worry whether could i go home o not. At about 6 the rain died down so i took my chance n rush home.

On my way home i spotted Inspector Lee's (he's not actually a cop, just a nick) car and was wondering where he's heading.. anyway i got to the pertol station to refuel and to get my rain coat since the rain just picked up again. When i got home, the rain went from medium to heavy... talk about in the nick of time.

Sigh... exam is so close and i've not finish my tutorials... could i live up to my promise dat i'll finish Lo's tutorials at least 3 times??? I hope i can.. i need to do VRY well if i wish to pull my grades ... wish my luck guys

P/s the * actually meant a idiom, it is raining cats and dogs.. there r no animals in uni.. only monsters hehe i.e. me hehhee

Short trip to Nilai

Well today is our little gathering cum farewel to Chiun, who's going to leave to UK tis sun morning, and YF, who leaves to the states on july. The gang decided to wait at mid valley at 530 so after i've finished watever i need to do at windz place (we were discussing bout our FYP) i met up wif Chiun at Wangsa Maju station. From AJ i go to know that Chok Chuin did not clear thus he won't be going to UK.. sad news... sad news indeed...

When we got to Mid Valley, we went to McD n waited there... While waiting we go ourselves a sunday.... After HY arrived we waited for FP. When she arrived, i guess she din see us coz she went into McD looking for us, HY n i were laughin outside haha... how could she miss us?? Well may be is the crowd in front of us thus she over looked. Well we moved on to look for YF. When we found her she was bz wif her stuff and HY went to MPH which later i followed, i went to look on some books that i hope would be of some help to my project. Saw some interesting titles such RFID toys and BlueTooth Toys... interesting but no.

Later when i got back, YF turn to my side and said "Wait for CH to... " then she scared herself. Without her knowing, i was already by her standing side. We went to Little Penang to have our dinner and then called 018 that we'll b paying him a visit. While eating we behaved like we own the place, making a lot of noise tis n that.. haha. After our meal we went of to HY's place coz FP is going to park her car there. We start our little journey at bout 8 or 815 i think.

While on our journey, we still continue to make a lot of noise.. haha i guess birds of a feather, flocks together. Suddenly Chiun rmb bout the little scene from Shrek II. "R we there yet?" both of us went on and on until it annoyed almost every1 in the car, even after he stop i kept on goin which resulted in a slap haha... The whole journey was fun, we talk bout a lot of rubbish stuff like we used to.. Sometimes i really miss the miss calls we like to pla etc haha...

When we got to 018's place.. wow the place looks great. The hse was huge but when we got in.. haha i was shocked. The living room is full of stuff, from ladder to tool box to climbing equiptment haha.. when fatt told us that they install almost all the electrical application at the house i was suprise. I guess tis fellas really put wat they learn into real application haha. The best part was that he's housemate owns a personal DC power supply, a DMM, and a Tektronix scope.. tis hse is really a heaven to those engineering student who is keen to have hands on.. really a master piece.

Later we went to get ourselves a burger, as HY n YF was walking to the door, suddenly 018 push the door and force both of them out trapping them in between the doors. It was funny looking at wat he did hahha.. locking them in between, no where to go. We told FP who was slowly untanggling the rope to finish untanggling first. While outside, both HY n YF was shouting n knocking on the door which was really funny hahah.. they din expect to be lock out by 018 hahah.. thinking back it was really funny hahah..

Went across the field to the burger stall n ordered some burgers. WHile waiting HY actually ask to borrow a bicycle that was there. YF n FP took turn at the bicycle too. When the burger was done we went to one of the seats on the feild n ate there. Oh yea, i should mention that the field was great, the stars look wonderful there and the air feels so clean. 018 told that when this place first launch each unit only cost 140k which was relatively cheap. Too bad i'm still jobless, if not i sure will consider haha..

Well after burger and a lot of chit chat we decide is time to go since i got class next day. We went to take some photo at the field and some inside the house haha. From the time we dediced to leave till the time we ACTUALLY leave.. its minimum 30mins more...aih... but nvm since its been sometime since i last saw ah Fatt . Got some funny pic of my but too bad i've not got them yet.. mayb later haha

I guess i won't be posting any photos tis time.. hehe.. till next time ..

Season of Loneliness

If i've ever wonder how is like being lonely.. today is a vry good example. After class i was in the library finishing up on something. Later i went to DSA n had a chat wif the officer. The chat lasted for sometime, and it started raining vry heavily. I have no where to go so i sat there n waited. The dance club committees was there n i know most of them but as they were bz preparing for their event next week so i din spend much time talking to them. Anyway, the loneliness part is not tis. May be it is.. ... well u see, i was there sitting there like an idiot nobody came to talk to me, nor did i went n talk to them. The room just felt so cold all the sudden.. is like nobody care a damn bout u and ur just stranded there... As i din bring along any text book, i can't study, i din wanna go back to the library since its raining, and i cn't do much bout my FYP so i just sat there. Did some mumbo jumbo stuff like the society missing members etc but when i was done i was lonely again. There is just such a void in me that ... ... well feels so empty n sad. I guess tis is wat loniliness feels like.

Having such a feeling i can't help thinking bout something else. All the sudden i feel like i dun belong anywhere. Nobody seems to know or care bout me when there is nothing going on; i can't help feeling that my presence is only felt whever there is a crisis or havoc going on. I'm the type of person that would jump in, make it happen, moderate the flow and then dissapear into thin air again without having people knowin that i was gone or knowing i was even there. And after an event is over, my existance will be wipe off the history books... To be unknown is nothing; but to be forgotten.. ... ... is worse than death.

Here lies
the unknown,
unheard, and
unseen
entity only known as Leech... ... xxxx - xxxx


Another thing that is borthing me is that, today is the 2nd time i bump into SC and somehow is like i can't squeeze a word in. Is like i'm no longer welcomed in her frenship circle.. wel mayb is just me being too sensitive but i can't help it. I just can't help it if i'm getting a negetive aura from friends... i feel so .. ... uncomfortable, so uneasy.... an icky feeling. I dunno wat happen but i intend to find out, may be after the showcase as she's also involve in it. Anyway i think it doesn't matter as i need to focus more on my thesis that all these things; yet when come to think of it. Is it worth it to lose a fren just because of academic?? Ez question but a twisted answer.

Before i end, i found that there is a song that could represent how i'm feeling, its the chinese song by Lin Dan, "Yi ke ren shen wuo", Survive alone. (I might have got the singer's name wrongly)

Feelings.. y r u back?? I thought i've put u away so that i do not have to feel again.. but how come ur back??? Dealing wif feelings n emotions can really wear u down ... ... ... Be strong, stay focus n execute!!!

English is not only a language; its an art

Today is the 2nd day i attend the progressive writting course and its been both entertaining n educating. I've learn quite a number of Rule of Thumb to use while writting and it has further reinforce certain things that i've been praticing. Hopefully at the end of this 4-day course i'll be able to produce a better writting that all my current work; i know i will but to what extent? Only time will tell.

Anyway today in class i manage to have some chat wif an old fren of mine. Old fren is in a sense that she is among the first girls i got to know when i joined the uni; she's one of the groupmate during our orientation ice breaking. Shu Huin is the name and i've always found her to be sweet n frenly. I went to tell her that is seem suprisin that we've known each other for such a long time but has nvr took the effort to get to know each other, even each others' name. Well hopefully after today we'll be able to have more chatting chance in uni haha...

Later after the class ends, i went to met up wif Kenny n TTL. We went to LowYat, i wanted to get an USB interface card coz my onboard USB is dead, TTL wann get a new HDD and help his fren send something for warranty and kenny was doing some info gathering. Later Kenny ask us whether wanna go for a drink coz his fren called him up, well its ok wif us so we agreed.

We met up wif his fren, a sweet, pretty n friendly girl who was his primary skool fren. We had some laughs due to our marvelous sense of humour. I found out that she actuallys stays vry close to my area haha.. may be there's a chance that we'll bump into each other sometime haha... When it's time to leave we offer to walk her to her car, and luckly we did, she parked her car in an unpleasant area which is truely dangerous for a young lady to be walking alone. All of us warned her telling her not to park her car in tis area again and if she has to then make sure she leave b4 sunset.

Later we went for a 2nd round n Nailis. By then it was alread bout 9+ and we haven't had our dinner. I ordered the Nailis Burger Big Bite... well it looks nice but the meat was kinda salty. Nice but salty... bout 11 we all went our separate ways coz TTL is complainin he's sleepy.

Went i got home i got a phone call from TTL.. he went screaming that his PC dun have SATA II port.. i went to scold him saying that if he dun have SATA why the hell he wanan buy a SATA HDD?? aihh...

I was backstabed...

Today Liz ask me give her some directions to Sg. Long campus for a meething, since i've nothing better to do so i agreed. When we got there we went for brunch at a little shop. While challenging her she shot a "pearl" (those blk thingy u put in drinks) at me together wif some of the drink.. the pearl hit my shirt n leave a green mark on it ... i should hve known better that play wif her ... haha... stupid me ..

While she was having meeting i called NiteCat, since i'm in the area. While waiting for her i went to the lib and i was suprised... the library looks neat n big haha unlike mine. When she arrived we went to the lobby n chatted for some time. After Liz finish her meeting n sat down i started introducing both of them. When Liz decided is time to leave n while we were walking to the exit, suddenly out of nowhere i dunno wat happen she started talking bout going for movies which was totally fine wif me n NiteCat. I leave it to the ladies to discuss coz i'm not the one driving and is NiteCat's choice to follow o not.. so i went to the gents.

After i got out, Liz starting mumbling a lot of stuff at me saying how bad i treat her, how tis n that.. i was left in the dark. As she explain i started to get the picture. NiteCat must have told her how i was like to her last time when i was there. We n the SoTalk gang went for satay and both of us went for movies... Liz keep going on n on bout how bad i was to her and all i said that i'm vry good to her.. while i'm not arguing wif her hahaha.. honestly i dun know... am i so bad ?? =_=''' Anyway since somehow i promised nitecat a movie and i din live up to it her movie ticket was on me and somehow Liz manage to squeeze another fault to me and... wat the heck is monday and its once in a blue moon.

While drivin to Mines, the ladies was talking where good to eat n liz was ready to squeeze another round from me which i just acted plain dumb haha... At the cinema we decided to went wif Persidon which is not a bad choice... the movie was great, it really plays wif the human emotions n start to make u think.. Wat if it happen to u?? Wat will u do?? Overall i would rate it a 8/10 i think. After movie we sent NiteCat home n i got a bit hungry so we went to have something to eat at the hawker center. After meal n some chitchat we left.

While driving back to campus (since my bike is there) Liz n i started talking and i really can't help to agreed wif what SC once told me, Liz n i are really quite similiar. We think alike and we have bout the same attitude towards our work... she is almost a mirror of me. We share the same feeling bout how some ppl can b so bloody good in studies wif almost no effort. We share the same opinion on how things r suppose to b handle and a lots more stuff. Which makes me started thinking.. I really wanna put in some effort n teach Liz some of my management stuff since i see potential in her but she dunno how to use it.. so i do plan to help her to bring out the best in her. Trouble is.. HOW?? hahaha.. who am i to mentor someone?? i can't even take care of myself haha...

Loneliness ain't scary... but solitude is

Had a lot of time to think lately... i got nothing much to do since its the sem break. Dad is using the PC, i'm kinda lazy to do my FYP since i've not have any reliable information so i resort to the next thing to waste my time... i start to think; u'll be suprise at the amount of time i spend thinking about almost everything that had happen around me recently. But it usually goes down to a few thing, namely my personal development, my frens, and my love life (if i have any) and at some point it usually frustrates me.

Actually wat am i?? I mean, ppl always goes around telling that u r unique and u hve strengths that some1 else doesn't and those sort of shit but when i do sit down n think, i cant really think of any of my strengths that surpass all else. Some ppl could just study a single nite n pass the tha paper while it took me 3 whole days n nites to study and yet i came out wif a "D"; some could just go and charm himself a soulmate all within a month and i can't even come close to getting to know some1 deeper given a year period. Some could spend 2 sleepless nites completing tasks given while i'm already a dead fish after the 30hr mark. Some could keep their focus at their homeworks even at home while i can't even concentrate whenever i'm at home. There is a saying "One type of rice breads millions kind of people" well u r not going to get an arguement from me on that but i just cant help it.... Why am i so much inferior to them? What is my strength compare to them?? Yes i'm highlighting the best of ppl around me but the point is that they r something i'm not, they've achive something while i'm still a nobody.. the only thing that i dare to say that i'm better than them is that i'm a workaholic.. and is that a good thing? U tell me ... I can't understand wat is wrong wif me.. I got a brain that just stop functioning when i leave my work place (ie skool)

Was chating wif YK ytd n she brought up a good point... how am i going to get myself a GF wif attitude like tis.. i can't help to agree.. i mean i'm bloody passive, i dun even dare to call up ppl coz i scared that i might disturb them .. i mean come on... WTF is this... All i do is to use words n letters to convey my msg around without directly talking to any1. Talking bout getting a gf... i've decided to stop all my feelings from now on since the signal i've been getting recently has been less that encouraging ... I mean no use longing over somehting u can't rite. So i might as well close the file, just move on n concentrate on my work w/o looking back. I shall return totally forget bout feelings n emotions once more n forget bout even having feelings. I envy ppl who've found their soulmates, i mean looking at them wif their luv one... the feeling is no doubt warm n comfortable but i think i can live without them. No i have no intention of being a bachelor forever just that i decided not to think bout it for now. Well like the song goes, "yi ran shi peng you" by YuHeng

Sun Tze once said, "Know urself, know the enemy; and you'll shall a win a thousand victories." Well he's right on that but the thing is that i myself dunno wat is wrong wif me .. so how could i win?

To be unknown is nothing, but to be forgotten is worse than death

Cant think of a title for tis

I dunno y but recently i do realy feeled troubled n worried. Reason?? Well is quite simple actually.. first n foremost is coz my FYP... just got news that the title we proposed could prove troublesom for us to complete due to a lot of technical problems, hopefully CCL is able to sort them out... i'm jsut the follower here tis time .. so i jsut do wat i can to perform

the 2nd thing is .. well my family i guess.. dunno y but recently mum n dad r quarrelling even more, n usually coz of small crapy stuff... and the best part, i'm always there, in the middle of it all... #sigh# WHY!!!

the 3rd thing is this.. i just can't understand y that i can't find any1 to call recently. I mean i just wanna call some1 to talk to but i can't think of 1, and when i do, i just dunno how to make the call haha... ironic... i still can't get over the phone phobia thingy that i have (there's a phone phobia?? ) its always like this, i pick up the phone, and while dailing i just like wanna put down the phone n assume that i nvr pick it up... its only if i'm able to finish dailing n it starts to ring i can lose the feeling ... WHY WHY WHY!!!! if tis continues on i wonder how will i be able to court girls hahaha... damn...

Oh yea.. Nightmare has just begun

Went to met wif Choon Seng today.. he was in KL n he ask me out for brunch?? hehe.. well he's certainly a somebody today.. he got somewhere after been working for 3yrs. Good for him. We did some catch up and later it was goodbyes. I got back to uni just to find out that only the MMT supp list was out. After some running around.. i got home n started wif my Maple hehe..

Oh yea.. i was happly leveling until i got a msg... Lo's out... .... ... .... I went to the intranet n look at my reeults.. WTF... i got a D for the damn paper.. i thought i would manage at least a PASS.. but .. @&$^)!$!%^!%#)^$^!@ curse it.. I dun understand.. wat is wrong wif me .. how come someppl r able to just go thru it 1 nite n got thru it fine while i've been cracking my head studying for the damn thing and all i got was a lousy D.. I have to take the supp.. if not my CGPA will go down the drain if not the toilet...

CURSE U!!!!

well enuf of sulking... need to continue to work on the damn thing ... God give me strength

I"m addicted ....

What have they done??? Thnx to Windz n Meng i'm now addicted to online gaming again...arrrrr...

DarkMyst is back.... but tis time the name is spelled DarkMyzt hehhe....

The Memoirs Of Leech 2005 (part2)

Well was going thru my previous post only to found that i've miss out a detail, on 14/2/2005, my hse got ransacked. Bro was at home and when he left he forgot to lock the front gate. The theives just came in, clam open the door and walk out as if they own this place... Bro called me back saying that something happen at hoe, i quickly rushed home n saw the damage. Damn... They run away wif mum's jewellery and those CNY angpow leftover cash.

Well the next thing on my agenda is... ... UTAR Ball hehe. I manage to get hold of a table so was sitting wif a gang of frens instead wif strangers. The ball? sux; the food? sux; the venue?? Lol.. sux... so overall.. the event sux big time... i din quite enjoy myself coz JS was rushing, but the best part was that i was able to meet wif the SoTalk gang and bump into Connie and Anthony, my 2ndary skool frens














My table at UTAR Ball














Some of the SoTalk gang
CityBadGuy, CYSS, Aniki, NightCat n Simmy













Not forgetting...
hikki, Vyy and last but not least.. me.. Leech :p

My sencondary frens ... .... ... err... well i wasn't able to upload my those photos.. dunno y blogspot dun let me post my beautiful fren's photo here. well guys, ur lost heheh

Well, after UTAR Ball there weren't much thing worth remembering since i forgot bout them hehehe... ... OK.. next on the list should be my involvement in blogspot hehe yup.. my first blog in May 2005 hehe.

May... ... yup, there's an orientation that we got involved in... yup.. me again as VC wif Carien as chair. Tis time i got involve in Ice breaking instead hehehe... well the things went quite well too if i do say so myself, except that i have to take the job as group facilitator and also game master which really wore me out..

My first photo wif the all the ladies hehe... dunno should i feel proud or should i be sadden by tis pic














The Wild n happenin - Camy
The Matured n Ladylike - YK
The Elegent n adventurious- Florence
The Pasive n quiet - SC
The Gatekeeper n Arbiter - HC
The Mad n crazy- Liz


The committees n the ME-team













Yup..it also brought along some chain of events such as me being known as 2nd boss, got to know another group of ladies (Jessica n gang), being known as the unbelievable, unbeatable, invinceble ME-team and not to mention later the missing ME-team member














Guess who's missing...

Next brings me to June where we sent KY off to Liverpool. Well, it started out like shit.. (i just read the post hehe) CCL and i were thrown around like a ball... we went to watch Madagscar and later was stuck in traffic for hours before making it to KLIA.

The boss of the nite.. Anchor Phoon wif the big man.. Loon














Well when i got the photos from Windz i found out that some of the photos were missing and they were the photos of ... ... ... so we know somehting was up.. only until later that we were able to found out wat happened and volla... a new grp member ~~ Irene... who she n i had quite a bad experience hehee....

Not long after sending KY to Liverpool it was my lil sis's 21st bday. She had book a room in Genting and ask us to go there to celeb wif her... so we did... Stop by ampang for lunch and then we were on our way. Durin the journey i remember ther was a Kancil who was racing wif us while we r traveling uphill; well wat can i say, an midified Kancil vs 5 man GTI .. who do u think won?? hehe...














At genting it was nothing much to do since we din go to the theme park nor did we gamble, but i did go in to those casinos n take a look at them. Ya.. we went to the arcades n have some game which i almost got addicted to it too hehehe ( i'm a gaming freak)













Game on ^_^

i din get much sleep either while we were at genting... instead of sleeping, my eyes were wide open... later at around 3am, JS, WY n i went to CoffeeBean to have a drink.. not to meantion to have some heart-to-heart talk. They kinda make me promise to "share" my little secrets when we r up there and i keep to end of my bargain. I answer all their questions as promised which turns out to be the biggest mistake i've ever done. I always wonder wat happen to the "It's between us" and the "Not a word beyond these walls" .. #sigh# I got to know their secrets and they got to know mine... well it USED to be my secret but not anymore. Almost any Tom, Dick n Harry knows of it thx to them. Always wondered y i always play by the rules? WHY???

I did say it was for a bday celeb rite? Since we din have a cake while up there, we had a replacement cake cutting session when we got back. Yup.... all was there except for CCL














Well that's all for part 2... later was all boring stuff or izzit??? i need to double confirm hehee so more coming up next time...

Yea... its holiday.... .... ... #sigh#

Well initially i was looking forward towards the holidays coz been bz wif skool work tis n that but now ... ... Its only oficially the 2nd day into my and i'm already bored out of my skin; i'm constantly looking for things to do, trying my best to occupy my time. Guess that after getting use to the hectic lifestyle, having holidays is not such a good idea after all. Which leads me to another thought. Am I so bloody mechanical?? Can't i function outside of working environment? Y cant i enjoy my holiday like everyone else?? Y am i constantly looking for things to do, looking for things to occupy my free time ... Like i've been scolding myself lately, i'm pretty pathetic nowadays, having no life, no frens, no fun... #sigh#

Holidays is suppose for u to relax n rest both ur body n your soul before going on to the next challange but ... ... i can't help it, i just can't help it.. i must have thing to do if not i'll bore to death. Tried to have a pack day by going about here n there meeting frens but still... i got limited frens. On sat went out to met wif NiteCat then went out wif TTL and later had a drink wif him n KKM.

On sun bore myself whole day at home before leaving the hse to give my bro a lift to the bus station, then went to look for my bday fren wif chris, lily, n CCL. It was kinda funny. when we got to Fish's hse she was quite happy n suprise to see us, then when we ask her whether can she go out she just frown... at bout mid nite we decide its time to leave and when we try to ask her to join us for a drink, we got a stern reply from her mum which pretty much scared us hehe. At Steven's Corner i manage to bump into some frens, 1st is that guy from TT then just before we left saw KK and his gang (well not HIS gang but his gang, wif LiCheun, MM n KwaiTeng). Exchange some hellos then went off since Lily was crying to go home.

Today?? Well today is a bad day. Been crackig my head trying to figuring out what can i do to pass my time... in the end, i was looking on the net for my pipe robot project haha... wat a "good" way to pass time... looking for info for my project hahaha.. #sigh# Actually i messaged a fren ytd nite asking whether wanna go out today but i din get any reply so i sulk at home whole day longing for a day to see my flesh rot.. Hope tmr will b a better day that today.. .

Nightmare's over ... ... or has it?

Damn... tis is actually a blog i written a few days ago [today is actually 1st of May] but when i post it.. guess wat happened. Connection error as a result all my hard written blog is missing... DAMN DAMN DAMN.... i can't remember the post at all and even if i did i wouldn't wanna write it again coz it would be the same ...

Wat i wanna say is that finals is over and i'm damn relax bout. Been working my sox of for the past 2 months and now is all about Rest and Relaxation.. hehe....

Let me see... my holi plans?? Finish on my unfinished blog such as my CNY holi and my 2005 Memoirs hehe...

PS there is actualy a lot of stuff in the original post but like i say it's kinda hard to write everything out again so i'm skipping it

Battle's over but the war is still ongoing

After weeks of shivering, its finally over... Lo's paper is finished... but.... .... .... ... damn.. i think i might actually fail that damn paper; shit, i thought i would manage at least a pass but .. #sigh#

Well tis sem i've worked harder that the previous sem but i've oso did more mistake that the previous sem. I did a lot of fatal errors n mistakes in the Controls paper, did some idiotic calculation error for Electromagetic and today... i totally freak out...

Well the worse is to come, now i got bout 24 hrs more to study for the next paper and i hate the subject... well basically i hate the lecturer even more.. I was denied of my marks for give the defination instead of giving key word?? WTF, since when that u can explain the word without telling the word be wrong in exam??? U have mud for a brain ar???

Hope i can hang in till fri.. then it's R n R and more Rs hahahaha

Exam is coming !!!

Sigh.... been longing to update my blog for sometime now but just can't seem to find the time... and when i have the time, i dun have to mood .. #sigh#

As usual, a lot of stuff had happen lately, of which, i've forgotten haha... been bz studying lately coz exam is just around the corner and its too close for comfort. Got tonnes of thngs that is still an "X" to me hehe.. Tis is wat u get for being lazy.

Now for some flashback... Last sat n sun i went to attend a leadership course which was organized by the student affairs, it was fun coz i was able to learn up on somethings that i know i have but didn't know how to use n after the thing i think i got some idea on how to be more effective as a leader hehe... hopefully :p... Anyway after the 1st of the course i was having a good talk wif Liz, when i ask her wat she thinks of me, she said that being around me is quite confortable coz i dun give out those "look-down-on-ppl" aura. Tis is something new hehe... well how could i look down on ppl?? I've been bullied, beaten up, dragged, almost involve in a fight, etc and one thing i learn is that "dun do onto others, wat u dun wan others to do onto u" so i always keep an open mind n heart to ppl around me. I dun care wat ppl looks like, as long as their r true to me i'll be true to them. Which brings me to a little mentallity of mine.

I've nvr like combing my hair and tis has brought a lot of arguements in my life. I've nvr told much ppl bout tis but among the reason that i dun like to spend time combing my hair is coz i wan ppl to know that look dun mean so much; yea i know that first impression is usually the last but does being good looking SO important? I wanna give ppl around me something to think about. I mean i might not b the best looking student around and some do call me sloopy but the fact is that i'm a person that could deliver, ain't that more important that spending hours in the bath room trying to look your best? I dun quite care wat u look like or wat/how u think but as long as u can deliver i dun mind. Y do ppl only look at ppl skin deep?? Aint wat we learn in moral class that the heart is more important? Wat happen to all those teaching? Am i being too escentric? May be but tat's just me.

Well enuf of that shit. Back to the course.. like i say i've learned a lot but when it comes to the time to leave, every1 was bz taking photos with their groups n each other while me.. well my group members have all left me, i was late on the first day coz i was having a test but when i start to think about it, EngFei was late too but he seems to be ableto click wif his team... sigh... i am a lozer... big time...

Ytd CK came to KL so went out n met him.. we chat awhile and after he left i spend some time in JS's place. They read to me windz's blog which was vry interesting, he was able to put together a story so interesting, so funny, so entertaining that u just wanna read more .... unlike mine :'( I was nvr good in expressing myself nor am i "that" creative... like i say, my brain only works during office hours and all i could think of is work... all the sudden i feel so lame... #sigh.....# Well there is nothing that can be done now.. tis program has been written down n been executed for so long that it can nvr be undo nor changed. I guess i should start calling myself Lame Lee .... I'm kinda envious of them, i mean emotional has her fans on her blog and so does windz but me... its kinda pathetic that ppl around me usually ARE the center of attraction to everyone else while i'm just a plain ordinary NOBODY. I guess i'm vry succesful at being a ghost. I come in, do my stuff n then leave w/o leaving proof of my existance. Yea i always said that being recognized n appreciated is not vry important, but y izzit that almost everytime after any event, there is no photos of me in the event? I dun need the appreciation i just wan some photos... something that could give me some nostalgic memories... For example the TT that i emceed, i made enemies with almost everyone in the uni by accidently putting my arm around one of the contestant or the time i act funny in front of that camera w/ one of the contestant, or when i almost took over the emcee task from my co-emcee coz she dunno the flow of program, the entire working committee of the event... i wan a photo of that.. all that... but do i have it??? NO wat i have is just fragments of images that is floating in my mind... gheeezzz

Well those r now ancient history now... finals is coming soon... i better get back to my books. I'll b back wif more of my frustration later... until then.. i'll keep on sulking...

Finally its over ...

After a long suffering.. its finally over ... just had my final mid term today and since its over, it felt damn good hahah... i smell freedom today hahaha...

Well wanted to blog few days back but was preparing for the damn mid term.. anyway, i had a talk wif the "Fly" bout 2 days back on something quite personal.. well i'm glad that i'm able to talk to her coz i really wanna hear some constructive stuff for once... i hate that problem... i hate having something on my mind that i'm unable to settle, i hate having problems involving feelings n emotions, i hate myself for having that problem... but after talking to her it did felt better. To advance or to retreat; to hang on or to release... sometimes the answer is not so easy after all... deep down i wanna continue but some part of me is saying that it won't work so just drop it n move on... i dunno... should i ?? could i?? would i?? After our little discussion i've decided to hang on.. giving 1 final go at it after the finals... i think just hanging on is no use, i need to take some initiative n make it work, or at least get an answer because i find it stupid doing wat i'm doing, and waiting or should i say hoping that something will happen. I need to win some battles to gain experience, courage and chances before i move in to the real war. Instead of sitting here admiring the green grass on the other side of the fence, i wanna get myself that green grass. Admiring will only make u sadder as time goes by, so i wanna try get it o die trying.

Anyway... i'll do it slowly coz finals is around the corner and i still got tonnes of stuff waiting for me. Need to get some bricks layed out for the society event, need to finish up Yeong n Niranjan assignment, need to do my presenatation on sat, need to finalize my FYP title and most importantly, i need to ensure that i will score at least an average of a B+ in all my papers this sem if i wanna see a 3.0 again. With my half sick, half broken body, will i be able to accomplish so much?? Well i've done it before so y not do it again..

OH yea... went to the Parlimen ytd.. the trip was fun haha.. i spend my time looking and studying the CCTV system and the sound system in the hall instead of actually understand wat the representative is talking about hahaha... i guess i'm too much being an engineer now. Before going in the Parlimen i made some funny remarks that really turn around everyone haha.. i guess the pratical joker side of me will always remain but the fact is that ppl enjoyed my crazy n most of the time silly n stupid jokes haha...

Hey tis reminds me.. its been bout 2 weeks now since i decided to become Lee once again, so far nothing much had happen... i wonder is CH still hanging on ?? Well i guess he is as die hard as Lee is too hahaha .. i wonder... .... ...

Lee, keep it up!! The world is tough.. but u r as tough if not tougher...

A good saturday ^_^

Well after all the test, mid terms n assignments.. i had a holiday today haha... well not excatly a holiday but is sure a relaxing day for me. After doing my things in uni, went of to meet JeChih n chris for lunch. The last time i saw her was when i was till in Penang during training and that was 3 mths ago... how time flies. After lunch we went to chris's hse, i need to burn some time since i got another appointment which i have no idea wat time it is hehe.. waiting for a fren to confirm wif me the time. At chris's place we chatted awhile, but basically is jsut JC and chris bout naruto haha.. i dun watch that anime, i'm still a GetBackers and OnePiece fan hehe.. Later afte JC left, it was jsut chris n me.. well we had some heart to heart chat which it has been awhile since i had a nice chat with chris.. feeling bad for her, is like i've put her in the freezer.. poor poor me ... aihhh... At bout 445 i left genting klang n head for cheras to meet my fren.

I was there early haha.. the first time that i'm waiting for my fren instead the other way round since she's always early haha. When she arrived, she decided to go for a movie which i'm all for.. my last movie was during CNY. Decided to watch the chinese movie 2 become 1. Then we went for a early dinner, since she's not taken her lunch (its almost 6 now). While eating i was conned into a game of true o dare. I initially choose dare and i was asked to sing but since i was still coughing; the dare was changed to a true n she manage to found out y i was a down lately.. i'm still not completly over bout my aunt's death.. later she share with me a little story she wrote bout her feelings where she use the clouds in the sky as the characters.. vry meaningful too... quite like it. She also told me that she now got herself a bro n she can't stop bragging bout it; how good he is to her, how tis, how dat... #sigh# hey i got myself some sisters too :p Anyway after dinner we went to get the movie tickets n went in.

A lovely movie... had the true friends feeling after watching it.. really like it, not forgetting vry OST, need to get those songs, especially the english song. Anyway after the movie we went back to the book store coz i need to get some pencil lead and may be look for a new pencil case.. mine all worn out. She was looking for a pencil case too, n i already its for who.. some times i think i'm too er.. know-it-all for the wrong reasons. Even before the news is announced i would have got a clue of the story. Anyway after that we have a stroll around the mall and bout 10 the doors starts to close so we found a place outside to sit n talk.

Is always like tis, we would meet up, go for a movie n then we would just sit n chat... although it seems kinda funny to some of u but i kinda like it, i mean to sit n chat has a vry nice feeling to me. I like to talk especially if is to my friends. During our chat, i ... ... well, i better not say much bout it here. Bout half hour later she got going coz its kinda late. I walk her to pay the parking ticket and later to her car. I got another round of lecture bout me keeping secrets again.. aihh... she even make me promise to talk to her when i'm sad... well that i can try but the other things... well.. i'm sorry, those are off limits, even to my family so as usual, i'm only sharing the tip of the iceberg of my un-happiness and worries.

Anyway dispite the cold last session i still enjoyed myself coz i had a good day meeting with JC, had a good heart to heart talk with chris and watch a good movie.. haha .. ^_^ i think i'm fresh enuf for the new week ahead... well for the week maybe for Lo.. hahha god please have mercy on my miserable soul .. Dr. pls dun kill us

Sometimes it would just be nice to just let it out

Was reading stupid egg's blog and found that she wrote tis, i'm quoting her
"more then best friend n he treat me better then a gf. but i dun want. i really can't take it any more. he dunno wat i want n need. i dun want a "best friend" with a relation better then lover while we r not."
sometimes this r the similiar things that pop up in my head whenever i start to thing of ... ... ... well we'll skip that part.. sometimes i just wan to have a relationship more that fren but instead... #sigh#... may be with all this frustrations of thinking of things like tis i've develop the habit of having sisters.. the first "sis" i have was Lynn, and we started quite funny too, it was her bro who introduced us and after some time i started calling her sis.. haha; then there's chris, and then jess and then stupid egg. Not to mention i got some part-time "sis" sometimes they call me bro and sometimes they dun.. all these luv collected over the years need to go somewhere rite.. so i guess it all goes to my sis.

Quite enjoy reading stupid egg's blog.. she let out all her feelings just like dat.. while me.. hah frankly speaking even while blogging i'm holding back on some information, i still unable to let go 100%, always keeping something within myself n keeping it as a secret to bring to my grave... #sigh# anyway after reading her blog i too like to have
some1 to pull my ear when i start to get naughty,
some1 to ask me to do my assignment when i get lazy,
some1 i need to waste time waiting and feels like it worth spending,
some1 i can hold her hand and walk together,
some1 i wanna be with forever,
Too bad that some1 is not by my side,
Else my current life will be quite a ride,
When will that some1 start to appear,
Coz i'm not getting younger by the year.

#sigh#

A not so happy bday (part 2)

Well i said i'll include the photos in part 2(http://aleech.blogspot.com/2006/03/not-so-happy-birthday-part-1-part-2.html).. so here it comes hehe


While waiting for... ... i oso dunno wait for wat, lol













Well at least everyone got something to do.. as for me??? LOL who do u think took all these photos :p














Alas, here comes the cake; it was in the fridge all the time but no1 wanna take it out.. #sigh#

Here r the cakes.. Leech and BoA's













Before make up















After make up















With fren like this.. who need enemies???














Alamak... Wrong cake hehe














Hehe.. need directions hahaha














Sange n Yasha?? Hahaha... Hey who's the main character here??














Walau.. let her eat still wanna give me tis kinda look... bo song ar???



Boo... Saw a ghost??

Well although i said that i wasn't vry keen on the thing but still i enjoyed myself wif them... n recently they've stop doin wat they did, which really makes me feel better ... but until when???

The Leech w/o CH

Actually i've came up with the thingy since last friday but due to unforseen reason i've hold back on it...

To the ashes it once fall,
From the ashes it will rise as before,
With the seal broken thy shall be,
The creature only known as the Emotionless Lee.

Goodbye CH its been a fun,
Having u around making things run,
Your service is no longer required,
So its only best u stay quiet.

Feelings are the thing that make me weak,
Feelings are the things that makes me weep,
Once again I shall forget how to feel,
And get things done for real.

Has isolation make Lee weak?
Will i be able to make Lee speak?
Either way the decision been made,
To break the seal as is today.

To those who is reading dun be suprised,
I'm basically about the same old guy,
The only difference that u might see,
I might not be as noisy as once thy be.

May dust to dust and wind to wind,
All my emotions shall be locked within,
I will now learn to forget,
The emotion n feelings that make me sad.

Wat cause this change u ask?
Or was there something that's been said?
Once again I will say,
Dun ask too much... for ur own sake.

Time will reveal, time will tell,
All the reason n the truth itself,
Till the day the truth b revealed,
Respect my decision n let Lee roam with zeal.

Thank to those who spend time reading,
Hope the time is worth spending,
Poem and rhyme is what i like,
But i only do it when time is right.

Thank you again,
For droping by n reading,
Hope u find it to your liking,
If you dun pls let me know,
I'll work on it starting tomorrow,
There is still room for me to improve,
May be i'll make this my brand new groove.

^_^
Lee

The last mile

Today is the day where my aunt is going to be cremated... everyone was there around 9+ and after some final rounds of prayers and some last words, she was brought to the cremation center. Along the way its kinda sad, seeing my cousins crying as they walk the final mile with their beloved mother... as a member of the family, we were excluded in this tradition and while walkin i can't help feeling sad too... In my mind the whole time was just the same old words, "Rest well now aunt... ur sufferin is over" it went on over n over n over again in my head... ain't there anything else dat i wanna say to her before she's cremated?? Guess i had a mind block then... Anyway.. its all over now... the ceremony, the tears... everything ... life goes on as usual. Me back to my assignments n studies and my cousins back to work and my nephews go back to skool...

Aih.....

My feelings n emotions

Tis week has kinda hard one for me, having a few of my frens calling me up n telling me how frustrated, sad and heartbroken they are with me borrowing them my ear, listening to their sorrow accepting their tears... it got me down too as i was feeling for them as well. Then later i found out dat my aunt pass away. Sometimes our life is just like a random signal waveform, like my lecturer say in class,
"For an information signal to be useful, it has to be random. If u r able to predict the waveform then it wouldn't be a useful information signal."
(hey i'm an engineering student aren't i) and in a signal there r always peaks and valleys, sometimes when u think dat u've reaced the max/min point... there's another higher point and that is life, unknown, unpredictable and unbelievable.

I'm kinda jealous dat my frens have some1 to call n talk to; even the person is me. In a sense i'm happy since they choose me as their medium to release all their hard kept secrets, coz tis means dat i've have earn a certain level of trust in their life and has proven dat i'm a good fren. Sometimes i feel like i'm a big sponge, able to absorb a lot of things. Wait... sponge might not b the best example since the things i know are their secrets so i have to keep them well lock up within me. The more secrets i keep the more pressure i feel.. coz i need to be more alert on the things i say in from of everyone else but i dun mind coz having the feeling dat u've earn ur fren's trust means a lot to me and i like dat feeling.

Anyway today's post is not about keeping secrets or about being a sponge.... ... ... ... Like i say, lately has been a tough week for me. Had a few sleepless nights, have tonnes of homework piled up, test, mid-terms, assignments, #blah blah blah#, etc... I'm the type of person that dun feel tired as long as my mind is strong and remain focus but having all tis negetive things happenning around me lately has really make me lose focus... thus.. i'm bloody tired n weak; physically, mentally and emotionally (hey tis is new haha, nvr know dat i have emotions).

Like i say, i've jealous dat my frens have some1 to talk to when they r down but wat about me? Do i have some1 dat i can speak my mind, heart and soul to?? Frankly... I dun think i have one. Despite dat i've start to believe in frenship, i've not start to believe in ppl when it comes to my personal issues. Always keeping things to myself sometimes drives me up the wall. Yea.. i got frens like SC, Liz, HC, then i got my "sisters" and the gang that i can share my thoughts with adn willing to listen to me; but the fact is that i can't... i cant make myself to open my mouth n start to spill the beans to them. Is not that i wanna act macho, that i'm invincible n immune or anything nor that i dun trust them but... well the only reason that i can come up with is that, they r just my frens and i dun like to trouble my frens with my problems. I got a good lecture from SC bout tis b4,
"That frens are there for u to share ur problems, and by doing wat i'm do i'm not treating ppl around me fairly. I dun have to be the listener all the time, always being there for them when they need me but has never open myself for them when i need a hearing ear, never go to them when i 'm down. It is just plain selfish of me to do that."
So i've learn to take her advice to open up to others but there is a limit to wat i'm able to convience myself to talk about, and the things r just a tip of the iceberg compare to what i have inside.

Sometimes when everything starts to go wrong and problems start to pile up, i start to go hay wire and it makes me really frustrated, sad n unhappy. During those time i really wanna find some1 that i can spill eveything to. Making me sometimes vry desprate to find another half that i could throw myself to, throw all my feelings, my emotions, my burden, and everything else that i've been carrying around wif me for all these years. My frens have been bugging me bout tis but... like i always say, u choose person that u wish to be with, it's the same for there other side. Is not that u like the person and that person will sure to like u too. You might think dat she's ur miss right, but she thinks otherwise... wat can u do then? Sometimes to make matter worse, she might be in love or like some1 else... then wat can u do?? I too wish to find some1 to call my own, some1 that i can luv, some1 that loves me, some1 that can be there when i need her the most ... ... the list goes on, but the fact is ... is not easy. I was never good in feelings n emotions since i've lost touch with them for quite a number of years so sometimes i dunno have i really fallen for some1, but if i do, i really do hope dat she feels the same for me too.

May be is for these reasons i start to take up blogging. Writting everything here, where ppl that i know, i dun know or those i might know might or might not read. Sometimes writing down ur problem IS easier that saying them out althought by saying it out u feel better awhole lot faster and having a voice to listen to is really nice. To me, the best thing any fren can do for u is to be there n listen to you when u got something to say especially when u r feeling down in the dumpster. I know i'm capable of doin it for all my frens but will there b that 'some1' dat can do the same for me?? Only time can tell...

R.I.P. to my aunt

After few months of fighting... she has finally laid to rest. My aunt whom has been absolutly a dear to me n my bro has finally pass on. Glad dat everyone manage to come back in time to see her off. I guess she must have been hanging on, beggin time from above to let her stay till ytd. Went to see her last sun in the hospital she was already vry weak... weaker that the time me and dad went to see her b4 she got admitted to hospital.

Came back from uni early today because i was so tired dat i can hardly keep my eyes open. As soon as i saw my dad, he give me the news that she pass away tis morning around 10am. I was stunned for a moment but i did expect it to happen soon. During dat time i was still ok i guess... but little do i know dat i actually have small droplet of tears building. Guess i really do miss her. Hard to believe dat i would shed a tear for her while i din even show any expression when my grandfather pass away. Guess i wasn't human yet then... ....

Got back from her funeral not long ago... going again tmr n on sun to see her off for the last time. I'm really sadden by tis news... cant help to have tears even while i'm writting tis little post ... guess my emotion lock is not as good as it used to ...

In memories of my dear aunt, an execellent cook and a "happy fruit" that nvr frown, always giving every1 a warm smile .. ...

Introducing Raiden of Infinite City

did a funny test ... and here's the results


I am Amano Ginji.
Which GetBackers Character Are You?
You are like Amano Ginji! You are lively, energetic, and have a brilliant personality. You are most happy when you are surrounded by your friends; as a friend yourself, you are loyal, truthful, and fun to be around. Be careful, though, to make sure to try to act your age. After all, there is only so much whining that this world can take.

Did it out of curisioty as i like the manga and the result is a bit out of my expectation. I was thinking dat i was more like The Forbidden Eye Mido Ban instead but ...

The seal to the Pandora's Box is broken

After some agonizing weeks i finally know the answer to the mind troubling question. I guess that sometimes, honestly is the best policy. Thru honesty i was able to know the answer. Thru honesty i was able to keep a friendship that i cherish. Thru honesty i was able to put down tis weight off my shoulder.

When you have put so much into something, its not so easy to forget it. I wonder will it go away or will it continue to live on within me; haunting me?

"I dunno wat will happen in the future ..." Is this some sort of a hope or is this a cliche...Tis is the 2nd time tis happened yet i've not learn and i dun seem to wanna let go. Am i too stubborn?? Or am i naive? But until i hear those words i dun think i'll ever let go of ... ...

Either way... does it really matter, what happen had happen.... ... #sigh# I dun think i'll ever let go unless i know the truth to those words... may be honesty is the key to the truth.

With the seal broken the truth finally revealed... as a result... mix emotions now

Anyway to make matter worse... Went to visit my aunt today. She's been hospitalized. Looking at her weak body really makes me weap. As much as i hate to admit it but i can't help thinking dat it would b better for her if she were to go in her sleep, at least she won't have to endure this suffering. I couldn't understand how she could b so weak all the sudden. She was still ok when we last saw her during CNY. I dunno wat to say anymore...

My CNY Holi Part 3

Well like i was saying previously (in part 2)... we went to bed and woke up quite early too.. around 9 i think ... hey we were tired... so 9 is quite early since we've been travelling whole day ytd. After we got ready, we went to the market to have breakfast... they say the noodle there was marvelous and indeed it was, there was a long crowd there waiting for it. After breakfast we went home and we waited for Phoon's jeep to return... if we dun go by jeep then it is vry difficult to go to the orchard. The road to the orchard was a bit bumpy... well, we need to pass thru some oil palm estate so the ride is bumpy... after bout 1/2 hr later we r there... W/o further ado we went fishing ... i was having trouble jsut casting the hook ... :~( but in the end i was able to get hold of it...

After a few try i given up coz there weren't enuf hooks so we have to share; the other fishing rod dun have a hook (but only to find out that there were enuf hooks). While i was playing wif it i manage to get a small fish... those bout 3 inch type... when i called for help (coz i have no idea wat to do) the line got caught in the weeds in the pond, when Phoon came to me it was a bit too late... the little fishy manage to escape the hook... according to Phoon, not many is able to catch those small ones, and wif those small ones we can actually use them it as bait for some other bigger fish, live bait is the best bait to catch those fish.. but too bad it got away.

Anyway, Phoon give me a tour of the orchard.. basically it is just mandrine oranges all the way (well at least i think it's mandrine orange ... a sub set of it at least) the place look quite big too.. i would assume it to be around ... erm.... er.. well i dunno how big but its big haha.. While walking i felt thirsty so i got a orange from the tree n jsut ate it on the spot haha.. talk about fresh hahaha.... "Peel fresh.. if it were any freshier, u have to pluck it from the farm" hahahaa.. guess wat... i did :p hahaha.. It was really amazing...

After the walk Meng and KT were still fishing... suddenly Meng got a bite... it was a BIG fish... w/ no experience he quickly called for help... i was around but i myself dunno wat to do so i just stand there n watched... he tried to reel it in .. but too early... the fish was fighting... spalshing everywhere ... and ... suddenly ... ... ... the line snap... the fish was too heavy and too active to be reel in... so it got away... wow... wat an expericne haha... With tat .. Meng got more enthusiasm to get a fish... he stayed on... bout 20 mins later ... guess wat ... he got another bite... Man... wat luck tis bugger has.

Tis time he quickly ask for help and when the guys came he quickly pass the rod to 1 of the worker there... he ask him to reel the fish in for him. KT played around wif the fish awhile then the worker reel it in... well i dunno wat fish it was but it was big, bout 14inch from head to tail... We put it in a container n then continue fishing. By then KT was a bit too restless, Meng got 2 bite but he din even has a nibble haha.. well he has actually but just no big fish to be reeled in. Even i got a small fish to talk about hahaha...

At bout 2 we start to leave coz i need to get to Pg. I got another appoitment there haha. I told Phoon to weight the fish, and it came to bout 2kg.. wow.. Meng is sure lucky. Phoon give us some fresh oranges dat he just plucked from the trees and we went back home. At Phoon's hse we all took our bath and then had our lunch... Delicous food, fresh fish (not the 1 Meng caught, it was caught by Phoon's bro) After we finish the meal it was bout 4+ so we went to the bus station and bought the ticket to Penang.

At 5, Meng and i got on the bus and left for Pg. The bus left Kamunting around 530, i msg dad, CK and Grn (i think); CK replied that to call him again when we bout to reach Pg. In the bus both of us had a short nap... coz it was really tiring... not enuf rest ... At bout 615, i called CK again, he told us to get of at the toll gate. And we waitied for him. While waiting, i notice dat i had sun burn around my arm.. it was itchy and a bit painful hahaha. At buot 640 CK arrived and we went to his hse straight. He told me bout his interview stuff tis n dat. 1 thing dat i really wanna comment is how CK drives... he's no longer the dare-devil driver that we once knew. Amazing
After a short rest, CK, Meng and i went to Island to look for JS. CK and JS argue awhile bout where to eat haha.. 2 penang-kia arguing on where to eat hahaha... Well we had dinner at a place quite near to Kek Lok Si coz we plan to go there later.

Kek Lok Si was vry beautiful.. it lights up like a lighthouse its so bright dat u can see it from afar. We stop quite far coz the traffic was terrible, we had a 20 min walk to the place which was quite a lovely walk minus the noise pollution from the car haha. Once up there, we walk around here n there taking photos, prayed and make some blessings. Later we took the er.. cable car??? to the top to look at the bronze Buddha. Its magnificant. Later i went to take a photo with my chinese zodiac "The Boar" hehe.. i think i look quite funny there.. too bad the photos not out yet.. CK still holding onto them.. i think i need to rush him for it.

After Kek Lok Si we went to McDonals to met wif Ai Ling... i wanna a payback.. while i was half dead she took advantage n mock me.. i wan a rematch !!! Got to McD 1st... CK just gotta race wif JS haha... Anyway in McD we did chat... made some "smart" remarks bout each other but pretty much normal, no nukes flying around as i expect. WY is as usual... acting damn cool, Meng... well he's just being him. Around 1230 we left for home.

Once back we just drop dead n slept. The next day CK say wanna bring us to go badminton wif his frens. Anyway the following day was a bit boring actually except for dinner and the short meeting wif my lil sis, CK ask meng and i to join his family for a family dinner ... both of us were like.. well.. we felt like strangers there but got to met wif CK's girl, and she look stunning dat night in her dress. Good ol' CK.. hahaha.

After dinner CK brought us out for some sight seeing around BM. Then we jsut went home... The next day we were to go to island again where Meng n i will spend a night at JS's place.
I'll talk bout it next time haha... its tiring having to write all these stuff, i wanna keep them detail yet dun wanna make them so long .. haha well i wan my blog to be my online diary anyway

A not so happy birthday Part 1 (part 2 will be w/ the photos)

Like my title imply... well actually the day start up quite well. I was ready for skool, i was ready for the guys, i was ready to spend a nite at either of their hses... but ... well i wasn't ready for wat they did.

Well having lunch the ladies came by and well.. they wanna make it big, initially i think they just wanna fool aroud wif me so i din care a damn bout them n continue eating. When we've finish they went to buy some drinks and to my amazement the ladies were havign their lunch nearby, witing hearing distance. The gang of course weren't content wif making my life miserable they wanna see me crack down n die... they keep on forcing me to say ask them to join us... din do anything bout it. But they keep on yapping on and on and on bout it dat i left n walk to the bus stop to wait for them. Then something really unbelievable happen... they did somehting dat i myself feel like slapping each and every1 of them to the ground and grind them using a bulldozer.. they've "helped" me to convey the msg.. At least dat is wat i manage to find out later in class.

DAMN... coz of their stupid actions i was so bloody angry dat i couldn't concentrate in class. Listening to wat Niranjan wish to convey is hard enuf but have to listen to Dr. talk bout Nyquist criterion n explaining everything is a killer... i need to give my fullest concentration to grasp wat he says but coz of them... i could even hold myself together... i can't even concentrate on wat Dr wish to convey... I was like wat we chinese say "fire blocking your vision" damn i was angry. I totally just wanna screw them up the wall n leave them there to die. I could nvr understand wat tis guys wan from me... can't they just take my word for it dat i've did wat i could ... why??? WHY????!!!! Have i've ever let them down in anything b4 so far?? I'm a man of my words so if i said dat i've done something then i've done somehitng ... so could all of u act like an adult n grow up. Damn.... I was thinking to msg n explained but Jess told me not to... since she added those words "I know coz i'm a girl" so i listened to her.

At the end of the lecture i wanted to collect everyone together n tell them wat they wanna know n ask them to get off my back but i wasnt able to get them together... so instead i just tell those who were there to forget it and i left... Seriously there n there i just feel like just going home after class, switch off my phone and just b off the world radar. I just feel like not attending my own bday celebration coz of them. I totally SO dissapointed in them. I mean come on, i dun have to answer to any them rite. Wat i do, wat i've said, wat i intend to do or say... i dun have to answer to them, i dun even have to answer to my family so WTF do they make themselves having authority towards my life n actions. Tis is ridicurious.

Later while walking away i remember dat i need to talk to Tong bout my society activity so i went up to DSA just to find dat its actually lunch time... i left n went to the library to do wat i think i'm able to do (wif tis fire within me.. i'm suprised dat i diun kill any1) Anyway back to wat Kah Wai told me bout DSA holding my activity coz the activity will make a loss to the society i was like ... WTF.. When i wanna make money for the society they say no; now i wanna spend my society money they say no. WTF... wat is this? I really dunno wat do they wan from us as society EXCO?? I dun wanna do activity they say kenot.. now i wanna do activity they give me shit ... damn... life sux... big time.

Later when class resumes, Thin ask me whether will i join later, during dat instant i really wanted to say no and just walk off but seeing dat it's also CCL big day so i just went wif it, even if i dun feel like it anymore. Later i send a sms to Sc to ask her to join us later but i din get any reply.

At 5, I went to Windz place and around 7 i went to JS place for dinner.. we went to Kenny Rogers for dinner hahaha there's bird flu around and i'm having chicken hahaha. I later got a phone call from Sc applogizing bout not seeing my msg etc haha... well at least i'm getting a warm welcoming voice .. so i guess i'm still in the clear. Anyway after finishing our meal we stayed awhile longer n we chit-chatted bout a lot of rubbish stuff.

We got back JS place, coz we need to wait for the digicam. At around 1030++ we finally got the camera and we went to Windz place. Me having a camera was happy snapping away photos of everyone... i guess i'm a trigger happy type of person hahaha.. They brought out the cakes .. 1 for me and another for CCL. Well i think i'll continue on tis part later when i get the photos. Tis is the best part of my celeb .. CCL and i did some funny n stupid things hahaha...

Before i end i wish to comment once again... ...
I attended the damn thing coz of CCL, if it weren't coz he's bday is so unique i would have gone home straight after class not giving a damn bout my bday; personally i din give a shit anymore coz i'm still upset wif them for wat they've done.